Fly to China for Family Reunion This Month
This blog will be reactivated after I come back from China in April.
The place I’m travelling to is my father’s hometown, a desperate village locked in the mist covered mountain. I’ve been there five times over the last 28 years: 25 years ago there was no electricity supply, 10 years ago I couldn’t find GSM mobile signal there and last year I saw the younger generation using their mobile phone for chatting on QQ.
Somehow I feel this part of rural China is dying. My uncles devoted the best days of their life in gorgeous cities like Shenzhen and Guangzhou, leaving their uneducated children at home in the village. The gap within my family is as obvious as the difference between city and countryside. More than three decades ago my father decided to leave that village, he took the exam to be a student in the school of medicine and then a psychiatrist after education. His decision changed everything in his life, and mine as well.
Last year I was told that my uncles were forced to move out from their house. A new road will be built in that area and the planned demolition required their “cooperation”. It happened just several days later after I posted the story of Tang Fuzhen. China has never been so REAL to me. Although I’m far away from China, I feel China in my own way. It’s about my blood, my nerves and my family, yes I’m going back to my ROOT now.
The picture of the village below was taken in 2000 (almost 10 years ago!), just after I took the National University Entrance Examination.
Quote:
…… 一般来讲如果是在重庆主城区这样的丘陵地区，街区之间的海拔落差可以被当作一种情调来品读，但是在川东乡村，恶劣的地貌锁定了贫穷与落后。上面这幅图是我父亲的籍贯地，我的祖籍地，此生我去过那里大约四次，第一次回那里甚至还没有通电，懂事后有记忆的三次。翻山越岭新奇有趣但是不具备任何成本经济性，单反一抬随手一拍就是仰角四十五度以上的山丘。上面这幅照片拍摄于公元2000年，高考完后算是回家祭祭祖。照片大约扫描于大一。出国前我又回老家去过一次，感觉是公路越来越不好走，因为那里的人们都离开了家乡。如果你仔细看看图，大概会对几千年前太行、王屋脚下愚公的悲哀有一定了解。
我在远离源头的二十多年漫长岁月里偶尔也止不住地追忆揣想源头之上的一切，有时甚至难抑想拥抱亲吻那片并不丰饶的土地的冲动，用下游的血回应上游的血。在某些随机漫步的情况下，今日我或许也会兀自躬耕陇上，但是这一切并没有发生。关于这个，我大约从十六岁上就告诉自己和家人，有的时候一个社会的细胞可以在两代人的时间里实现通常需要四代人实现的阶层流动。而就总体而言我向来热烈地呼唤一个多孔、流动的中国，人们需要在个体与宏观两个向度上创造更宽松自由的条件。每当提到山坳中国我喜欢说“回”，不管外界如何轻慢这贫瘠的一隅，我也不会掩饰对它的心意。事实上如果生活在革命年代我也许会成为某些人眼中死硬的暴民，这是没有办法的事情。在过往的历史里，敢于亡命的精神一般要经过三代才会彻底消亡，某些害怕这种事情的欧洲寄生阶层习惯于把这个过程换一种雅致的说法来表达，并且愚蠢地将人的尊严/气质与精细的生活方式/教育水平的关联绝对化。在中国反驳这等事情要简单得多，因为一百年来的覆巢下基本上没有一颗完卵，大家彼此彼此。
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